When will V-Day be over?
Parking Conundrum
Dating and Powerpoint
The break-up conversation: should you Twitter or text it?
Is dating today the new wild west?
At least I’m not in high school anymore
Dear guys: what do you really want?
Should you always split the bill?


Just about to spin her round and stick my tongue in her mouth when Dan comes belly dancing our way.

Suddenly Winslet Bosom's in a Fish-Dan sandwich. This is probably what he wanted all along - another pervy threesome.

Hairy Jewish Woman comes over with a couple of vodkas to save her girl.

It's getting late. People talk about making a move - got work in the morning.

"But this is the best night out I've had in years," protests Steve, as everyone finds their coat.

The midget seems very pally with the doorman, who must be at least six foot five.

One looks up, the other looks down - but they're both glaring at me.

"You should pick on someone your own size," growls the bouncer, as I make my way into the lobby.

All my classmates stare straight ahead. Wimps. Only one who reacts is Winslet Bosom.

"So should you," she shouts.

Fuck. The girl of my wet dreams is picking a fight with a beefhead.

Just about to run away when the doorman backs off with a gulp. Is this what love feels like?

We all say our drunken goodbyes. Inspect Winslet Bosom's ears as she kisses my cheek. Spotless. Start to wonder if she's got any flaws at all.

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