Yes, DMN – this is the way things are. But the results of this behaviour is a dating scene full of confusion, mistrust, animosity, resentment and defensiveness. Are you saying that people like me, or people like Paula (excuse me, Paula, if I’m misrepresenting your position) who clearly see the harm caused by “what people are actually doing” shouldn’t try to have others see it too??
If enough people DO see that the constant social evasiveness and misdirection causes more harm than good, and resolve to change that behavior, then ya know what DMN? Honesty will become “what people are actually doing”. Then we’ll have a dating pool filled with people who mean what they say and say what they mean. No more need for wondering, analyzing, confusion…we could actually just talk to each other directly and understand what’s going on. Like rational people. (Then Moxie’s answer to many of the posters could be “why don’t you ask him/her?”. I guess that wouldn’t be much fun)
For those of you who think that “fading” is better for the other person than saying goodbye and good luck: thanks for your concern, it’s appreciated. However, you are being counterproductive in your approach, since your desire to be kind is best served by being direct. Now you know.
Surviving a Breakup Is Easier than Spending Your Life with a Jackass
One Type of Man You Need to Dump Immediately
When She Says No: A Lesson in Boundaries and Respect
The Western Female Value System
The Proof Is In The Prostitutes
When Is It Your Fault?
Women Are Very Prone To Prejudice
Male Vs. Female Ingenuity
Men Are Better Than Women
If enough people DO see that the constant social evasiveness and misdirection causes more harm than good, and resolve to change that behavior, then ya know what DMN? Honesty will become “what people are actually doing”. Then we’ll have a dating pool filled with people who mean what they say and say what they mean. No more need for wondering, analyzing, confusion…we could actually just talk to each other directly and understand what’s going on. Like rational people. (Then Moxie’s answer to many of the posters could be “why don’t you ask him/her?”. I guess that wouldn’t be much fun)
For those of you who think that “fading” is better for the other person than saying goodbye and good luck: thanks for your concern, it’s appreciated. However, you are being counterproductive in your approach, since your desire to be kind is best served by being direct. Now you know.
Surviving a Breakup Is Easier than Spending Your Life with a Jackass
One Type of Man You Need to Dump Immediately
When She Says No: A Lesson in Boundaries and Respect
The Western Female Value System
The Proof Is In The Prostitutes
When Is It Your Fault?
Women Are Very Prone To Prejudice
Male Vs. Female Ingenuity
Men Are Better Than Women